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I’m still planning on writing more about dating, but I have something else on my mind.  I’ve gone out with one guy a few times now.  He’s poly and kinky – and smart and fun.  He has a primary partner and seems to have a good handle on poly.  

Until now, my husband has always asked that I keep any marks I may come home with to a minimum.  I’ve always  made a point of checking and trying to keep them hidden.  We only vaguely revisted the topic – I wondered if it was an unseen landmine, something unexplored that may illicit negative feelings.   Tonight, I said I felt unsure about him seeing the marks I have from Saturday.  He asked to see them.  

He looked, and with vey little pause said “you muat have enoyed getting those” and then he hugged me.  It felt and still feels so good.  Like we are very connected and finally in the same place with poly.  For continuing to identify as monogamous, he seems to have truely come to accept poly.    

There isn’t a lessening of our relationship because of my breakup with my boyfriend.  There isn’t a lessening of our love or connection as I start dating.  There isn’t a loss to our intiamcy after I shared intimacy with someone else.  All os these events have only brought us closer.  They have made us more in love and more connected than we have been in a very long time.  He is happy for me.  He is excited for me to start my new adventures.  I am happy and excited to share these new experiences and new people with him.   

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